One morning, I was on my usual way to work and all of a sudden, I saw him! Yes, I was seeing him after almost 9-10 years or probably more, I could not even remember!
My heart raced rapidly with a vivid thrill.
I was not certain if he’d seen me but I continued to be excited for the next few minutes until my vehicle went past him. Soon, I found myself recalling the days of yore.
It was 13 years ago to be precise. I was a 16-year-old who had newly stepped into my higher secondary life.
This new life was so different from school, fewer restrictions and fun years worth remembering.
I am sure that all of us miss our higher secondary and college days and would love to travel back in time, if at all that was possible. I too miss those days dearly and was elated to see him as it took me back to those memories.
He was a year senior to me. I still remember those mischievous eyes that could spark a fire! He was tall with a wheatish complexion, a smile that was very contagious (with his cute dimple) and an extremely attractive husky voice.
Out of the several boys that were desperate to befriend me, this boy won me over.
I got to know him when our classes were taken for a picnic on a beach. He wrote my name on the sand, which left many other girls envious!
I was on cloud nine and instantly fell for those playful eyes. How stupid of me!
The next day, he came to say hello to me and that is when I heard his husky voice and boy, what a treat it was. These greetings continued for more than a week and I don’t know when we exchanged numbers. We would constantly talk to each other, hiding from our family members.
He would talk about his mom, his dog, his house, the rain, how much he loved me etc. I treasured those talks even though they had no substance in reality.
I believe love does that to you; especially first love – you lose your appetite, your common sense, even your mind. You cannot figure what is happening to you or to the world.
Funny, isn’t it?
In no time, news about us spread in college. But I did not care, as he was all that I was interested in - the charming him, the fascinating him, the one and only him!
Love had made me merry but it had also made me silly, stupid and foolish as well.
I was silly because I believed his words, stupid because I did not think twice before falling for him and foolish because he ended up fooling me. My world came crashing down when I discovered that he was already dating someone else.
She belonged to his village and they travelled together to college. She was extremely crazy for him.
Even though she was aware of his flirtatious nature, she was always willing to accept him no matter what.
She even confronted me saying that he loved her and would marry her and that he never loved me, which I suppose was true. But there was another twist to the tale.
One day she was requesting me to leave him while the very next day she was convincing me not to!
She claimed she was just joking about them being together. But I could understand that she did this because he must have told her to do so and love made her do whatever he wanted. Blind love, mad love.
Thereafter, I confronted him only to listen to his lies and fabricated stories where he absolutely denied dating her. I believed him for a while.
My mind kept saying that he was lying but my young heart wanted to believe him.
My friends would tell me that he was a compulsive liar and I’d confront him, only to have him denying all such accusations. Finally, I made my mind.
I never wanted to leave him but I knew that was the best thing for me.
I knew the truth and I had to accept it, the earlier the better. So, I gave him a call, yelled at him for all his lies and told him that I wouldn’t let him fool me yet again and I hung up the phone.
My ego and wounded heart did all the talking.
Post that, he followed me to college for many months even though he had passed out. He gave me numerous blank calls, tried to get hold of me through my friends but no matter how much I wanted him at the time, I did not pay any heed to his traps.
I learned from this experience and became more cautious in all my future endeavors.
Coming back to why I was thrilled and not sad on seeing him after all these years? They say what hurts you today makes you stronger tomorrow. I forgave him a long time ago and moved forward in life.
What he did to me was because he wanted to; it was his character, not mine. It doesn’t hurt me anymore.