Hey beautiful people, I am a regular reader on AkkarBakkar. I felt like I too have to share my story here, so I am writing it out today.
Well, I got married a year back and by the Grace of God, I have a very loving, caring and cute better half.
As I am the only child, my parents consider me the “apple of their eyes”. My father is a short tempered person but I would be showered with all the love and care in the world. My life was nothing less than a fairytale. My mom meant the world to me and I would follow her blindly. She was the epitome of goodness for me. I considered her to be as great as God, if not more. The environment I was brought up in, was such that I would naturally agree to their advices and guidelines because my life revolved around theirs. Yes, I guess I was happy because they were happy. Maybe, all good things are meant to come to an end. Slowly, I started to realise that I am only doing as they are saying and I have no say in anything.
My wishes and opinions mean nothing to them. They think only they know what’s best for me and I have no right to decide or choose how I want to live my life. It wasn’t long then, before I realised that it had always been either their way or emotional blackmail. I literally had no say in my own life, even though I am a sane and functional adult. I realised that it was my fault because it was me who allowed them to control and dominate my life. I started feeling uneasy and everything was suffocating me. That is why, at the youthful age of 26, I agreed to get married. Even though in my family there was no pressure to get married, for them it was okay if I got married at 32 also. But I wanted to get out of that jail I was living in!
After my Btech from a reputed college, I pursued competitive exams (this, again, was my parents’ wish). I scored very well in them but couldn’t clear it after my interview by a mark or less because I belong to the general category so it takes time. It was difficult to get through in it, in the first attempt. During this time, they had a good rishta for me. This time, relatives were pressuring and I too wanted an escape. I got married, my hubby has a transferable job so my parents gave me a year to start learning cooking and cleaning. Till then, I am living with them.
According to them, it is an arranged marriage so I will need time to prepare myself. I managed to learn this too, so now my parents have started to think of me as a superwoman or something.
They think I will fulfill whatever wishes they have and I am their lucky charm. They just don’t bother with my needs or my future. Now again, they are after me to clear my exams. Clearly, I am not afraid of exams but I am afraid of them, their neverending selfish wishes and dominating nature. My love for them has vanished. Now I fear them. To do anything, I have to first take their permission. I am fed up! I can and have fought the entire World, but how do I fight my own people? They are nearing 60 years of age and they are becoming more aggressive by the day. Zidd to yaar inki badhti hi jaa rahi hai. They also tell me that my job is more important than my husband so I should put more efforts on keeping that than him. Who says that? That too, my husband was their choice, not mine.
It is a complete arranged marriage. I am slowly becoming immune to them and it is painful.