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I Wouldn’t Have Believed In Love Ever Again If It Weren’t For Him

( words)
*For representational purpose only.

I belong to a South Indian Brahmin family, where values and morals to family, culture, and inheritance are given a top priority. But I have got none. Why? Because I am 32 and not married.

I’ m not trying to brag here but my friends call me ‘a man’s dream’ for my look.

Well, I used to have butterflies in the stomach with thoughts of marriage and love when I was 21. You see, till then, I was this homely girl types. Now you may think, I’m 32 and still unmarried. How? Read the story.

Although my parents were modern in their thoughts, they were the worst example of being a married couple.

I didn’t even know how they stayed with each other for 23 years when I could hardly tolerate them for 23 seconds together. Whenever they opened their mouth, they fought. But my mother taught me that not all men are same. I always wanted to have a love marriage and my parents were fine with it. And the best part, they never kept any conditions.

Then I joined my very first company. I was feeling excited, nervous, and scared all at the same time. I was entering into a completely new world where I didn’t even know a single person and was ready to be in a relationship.

Then I noticed him inside the parking lot. And it turned out that he was the senior in my team. Could it be any better? The butterflies inside doubled. And I was so keen to be in a relationship that he easily trapped me into his fake love.

Within weeks, he proposed me and I said yes. It seemed so perfect to me until everything fell down in a fraction of a second. It was Valentine’s Day and he had made perfect arrangements that any girl would wish for.

He had decorated his house and I knew where it would end on. But I guess, I wanted the same thing.

I wore a sexy dress instead of my regular salwar kameez and went to his place. I was head over heels and was constantly thinking about how it would be two bodies and one soul. He was so gentle yet so manly. He made me feel like heaven. Little did I know that he had evil plans. He turned my heaven into a hell.

He recorded everything and started to blackmail me by saying that if I didn’t continue to give him and his friends the pleasure, then he would post the video everywhere.

My world crashed and for the first time, the bird inside the cage went free. Something suddenly changed inside me. That very moment I was not that homely girl anymore. I told him to go to hell and broke his manliness right there. And also said him to go ahead if he wished to upload the video.

I changed my job, I changed my city, and I changed myself.

I said everything to my parents. Initially, they were extremely angry but at the same time, they were being supportive too. I was 26 when they started pressurising me to get married. Trust me, by then I had lost complete faith in the institution named 'MARRIAGE' or being in any commitment.

The only thing that I loved was my freedom, happiness, and space.

I let very few people enter my life. Let's not go into fine details but until 30, I was in a live-in relationship with 4 different men who had same thoughts as mine. When you reach 30, you start thinking that you have become old enough to stop this stupidity. I still didn't want to get married but I thought to be in a relationship one last time.

I met him through a dating app. We moved in together and enjoyed our sex life.

Out of all I have been with, he was the most compatible one.

He understood my needs and slowly we started spending more time together. We would have breakfast and shower together and watch movies together. To our surprise, we both had the same taste in almost every aspect of the thing. We didn’t even realise when this physical relation turned into something more meaningful.

We were like perfect husband and wife. We never mentioned it to each other but we let the flow continue.

It was my 32nd birthday last month and the gift he bought for me was a surprise wedding for us. Both of our parents were present and without a second thought, I signed our marriage certificate.

Avinash, I know we both never believed in marriage but our relationship thought we needed a partner for the rest of our life. I know when you are around I can do any sort of stupidity and you will never question me. Share all your dark secrets with me and I can say this for sure that when I reach my death bed, you will always be there for me.

I want you to hold my hand through every phase of our lives and be my support system. I know I have told you ‘I love you, sexy’ a million times. I am saying here again.

“I love you, sexy! Thank you for coming into my life and changing my view on true love and marriage. I promise to be yours for the rest of my life and will be there for you always.”

With love, Janvi.

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