asexual Sexual orientation awareness normalize

Just Because I Am Not Like You Does NOT Give You The Right To Mislabel Me

( words)
*For representational purpose only.

I am asexual and here is what I have to say about it. For the longest time, I thought that I am not for love and that there is something quite not right about me. Little did I know, we live in a society where people hate things that are beyond their comprehension.

I will never understand hate unless you are queerphobic and a bully, of course. I realized I am asexual when I was fifteen. I did not care enough to confront anyone about it though. I knew people would try to talk me out of it and gaslight me into thinking that there’s something wrong with me. I resent being dismissed and mislabelled.

As an asexual, I will tell you that dating is so difficult. My asexuality put a lot of things in perspective. We live in a culture that glorifies hookups, executing impulsive choices saying- you only live once. So, I soon realized that some people only have sex as an offer to give.

I have had people telling me I should spend my 20s ‘exploring’ (and by that, again, getting some action). I have also had people trying to change me because they thought I was engaging with the wrong people or that I am not doing it right. I mean, don’t get me wrong- sex is fun, given you have it with people who understand your business. Because no matter what, your body deserves respect.

Here is the thing about asexuality: it is a vast spectrum, hence myriad experiences. My orientation keeps wavering around the pride spectrum from time to time, and I recently found out that we call this Aceflux. Aceflux is a sexual orientation where one’s sexual preferences fluctuate over time but remain within the asexual spectrum. Some of you confuse us with aromantic people.

A person can be asexual and aromantic, but these orientations do not co-exist. I hope we actively unlearn that sex is a priority for everyone because it isn’t!

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