I am sure you are freaking out just as I am looking at the live video of Arjun Bhardwaj’s steps for suicide. I empathize with the family and I extend my deep condolences to his family and friends. There is a group that says we should completely ignore the video and talking about it would only end up motivating people who have already given suicide a thought. True. Yes, dude! This incident shouldn’t be sensationalized, but don’t you think it's wiser to learn from such incidents?
When would we understand depression is a serious threat and even the great unwashed that you know of as happy-go-lucky are actually wetting their pillows every night?
Let’s for a moment forget Arjun and only focus on the underlying issue that exists in our society. What does a 20 something go through every day of his/her life? There has always been some correlation between social media usage and depression. Something about creating these social media stories every day like you are mandated to do it.
There are corners of social media that have a purpose and solely focus on things that matter, but let’s talk more on OOTD and Sunday lunch cooking.
Putting up pictures with every Tom, Dick, and Harry you meet in town who are definitely not your real friends (try calling them for help at 02:00 AM when you are in trouble), unnecessary extrapolations of ordinary trees, buildings, walls, bed sheet patterns for God’s sake, restroom mirrors, and what not. All these on normal days without social media, we would have definitely ignored.
Every time we want to boast about something new we bought, even if it’s as simple as finding a fancy fruit like strawberry, your mind is crying “It’s time for a new post”.
Okay, I know what you are thinking. You are out crying on your screen as to what’s the harm in posting everything I do? We totally get free WiFi at our places somehow and we are putting that to its optimum utilization. Yes, bro! Completely agreed. The issue is not monetary and that’s why these “stories” and “FB lives” are so popular. Okay, so what really is the issue then? I'm telling you what.
Every time you scroll through that newsfeed, you look at so many stories and pictures of happy faces floating around. You are under the impression that everyone you know is living it up while you sit alone counting your own teeth at your place. No! No, once again, simply to stress it enough. It’s never true that people who put up posts and pictures are all leading an exciting life. In fact, those are the ones who are lonelier than anyone else.
When you are actually having fun, you never get time to post it online.
No one’s life is that exciting every day. It’s all an illusion that we need to get rid of right now. Haven’t you ever felt by scrolling through this shit and looking at all these people, you are actually giving them your valuable time and attention which they don’t deserve at all? We should be more selfish than that, come on. Our time should be spent on ourselves rather than wasting it after looking at all these people, half of whom you only know on the first name basis.
It does seem like exaggerating over just a couple of pictures which is actually supposed to be fun and not a damn social issue but no! That is where we are so wrong. We think it’s just a story, but it’s an evil freaky tiny little button, pulling us all closer to our graves.
Why do we feel so compelled to talk about our daily lives?
When you actually don’t have an exciting event, you post absolute crap of everyday things fashioned in a way it looks exciting to fellow idiots who are looking at it. A major portion of us reading this are guilty, but we do need to stop glorifying lipstick colours and paneer dinners. It's so not cool anymore.
Coming back to Arjun who is a lot like all of us, a guy who enjoyed looking at the scenery with a description saying “A view to die for” posted along with this smiley that has this meaning - “Is so happy that it is shedding tears of joy. Has a fit of laughter and can hardly contain itself” only a day before the unfortunate incident! We don’t really mean that when we use it, but then when you read it along with a post, you assume the person posting is genuinely enjoying the place and we don’t presume he/she is under depression because, for us, social media is everything. He then eats pasta and shows it in the live video. One can only assume that he has been enjoying his food, but just not good enough to stay alive to keep eating it. Well, what does that tell us? It shook me for a bit when he showed notes that he wrote for his family and friends. The fact that he had important people in his life and yet chose to die is very sad. The point being someone like you and me, who is fascinated by sceneries and good food, was in fact depressed.
We all materialize our life to make it look attractive but we are lonely as f**k.
It’s true that people who are socially active might be happy, but let’s talk about majorities. Let’s just accept that and care for each other. Next time you see someone posting crap every one hour, go hug him/her and say you are there to help. Tell them you are listening. We don’t have to talk to our phones while we can talk to each other. There is no pressure on any of us to document every little thing about our lives. Sometimes it’s nice to keep certain things to yourself and to be fully caught up in the moment without getting distracted about posting it online. We only need to say “hello” to each other to express how we feel and believe me, it’s a pure delight to witness someone speak to you with a deep passion about something they enjoy about their life and you reciprocating the same.
Let’s tell our stories in person and make way for a harmonious, simple, and real life.