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I Found Love After My Husband Died But He Couldn't Tolerate How I Was Still A "Wife"

( words)
*For representational purpose only.

Four and a half years after my husband’s death, I met someone I fell head over heels in love with. He was the perfect boyfriend, totally the husband-material kind and a flawless human being, or so it seemed. When we started dating, he never once faked to be someone that he is not. His authenticity and realness drove me crazy. He pampered me to the point of spoiling me. He took me out for dinners and drives, bought me gifts, cared for me when I was sick and so much more.

I always wondered what I did in my previous lifetime to deserve such a gem as my boyfriend.

It’s not that we never fought or never had disagreements, but the maturity with which we both handled it, made me believe in “happily ever after” once again. He ingrained in me that love is the solution to everything that a couple goes through. If you really want to be together, then nothing or no one can separate you, not even the seemingly irresolvable issues. And so, my dream love life continued for another year before he declared that he is leaving for the US to take up another job, which would add on to his professional profile. I was upset but did not wish to be a hindrance to his growth and hence I faked enthusiasm and joined in his celebrations. I had mixed feelings about his farewell. On one hand, I trusted the bond that we shared and was convinced that it will grow stronger but on the other hand, the practical side of me told me that long distance relationships ultimately fade away.

His intention was never a question of concern for me. It’s just that I had seen long distance relationships of my friends dying a natural death due to misunderstandings.

And yes, that day came very soon in our life too. My ex-husband’s company called me out of the blue, to inform me that I haven’t claimed my dues, the retirals that I am eligible for. I was surprised so I inquired about it and found out that the amount was quite substantial. It would be lying unused in the government accounts, till I claim it. My friends till date consider me a fool for telling this to my boyfriend and yes, a fool I was. He immediately passed a judgment saying that my ex-husband’s parents have a right on that money. This, when he did not know the details about my past life. He jumped to a conclusion that I am greedy like all other girls are and that I am blinded by this fortune.

He accused me of not being able to differentiate between right and wrong and in a very self-righteous manner, he told me that he will not be able to continue with me.

I was zapped and did not know what to do. He wasn’t ready to take my calls or respond to my messages henceforth. I decided not to go ahead with the claim but what difference would it make if he wasn’t even giving me an ear. I was shattered at being dumped because of something which was not my fault. More so, I could not come to terms with the fact that the person who had seemed so reasonable and logical, turned out to be an MCP who could randomly dump girls without an explanation. After a couple of months of crying and wailing, I kind of accepted his deception and offered myself various explanations: maybe he got insecure, maybe he was actually looking to get rid of me and this served as an opportunity etc. Anyways I have managed to forgive him completely, but the pain still lingers on. I went ahead with the claim and got my dues on time. I used that money to gift my dad a new car as the old one was in a rattling condition. After all, my dad was the one to spend on my marriage, and even on the last rites of my husband.

This was my way of appreciating the one man in my life who truly needed to be appreciated for giving me all his support, unconditionally.

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