I am a feminist and was raised in a progressive family where there is no difference between a son and a daughter… It is strange that I am sharing this story because, despite dropping hints to my parents, I've never openly discussed it with anyone except for my sister.
My uncles and cousins were always there to protect me and provide me with everything I wanted. It's strange how a girl (now a woman) like me could have experienced sexual harassment and chosen to remain silent.
The first time someone touched my vagina was no stranger, but my father's student and a family friend; he was our neighbour, and he was loved by my entire family.
My aunt had constantly told my parents that he was no good, but no one believed her as she was uneducated and came from a conservative family; now, I wish my parents had listened to her.
He touched me in places I'd not want to be touched again. I have a fear that when someone else touches me, I will be reminded of him. But I can't say anything to anyone since my father, who loves me so much, his heart will be broken.
He is someone who cried when I got hurt as a child and who fought with everyone for my freedom and independence. If I tell him that his favourite student did it, he will not be able to take it. Hence, I never had the courage to share this with him. Things only get worse from here…
My first kiss was with my friend's husband. Her small family of four, with three children, and her husband had been a great support to me while I was living overseas alone.
Let me give you some context for why I need this little family. Due to my liberal beliefs, I had received a lot of backlash from my own community—now and then, men keep asking me for sex because I am a "modern" woman, and they keep spreading rumours about me that they had slept with me or seen me with someone else in other places, and even spreading it so far that someone from my country contacted me on Facebook and said I am "that kind of girl."
Except for my friend and her family, no one would talk to me or not believe the rumours, and I spent my three years talking and spending time with her family.
One day, she left the country for a vacation, and I was leaving as well; her husband just came to help me with my luggage.
I don't know what happened; he was helping me for one second, then confessing his feelings the next, and was trying to kiss me later. I still get numb just by remembering how I managed to stop him and make him leave my room.
I was so scared that I left my dorm room and spent the whole night at the airport. And I can't tell my friend this; she is my only strength, and this would break her heart and her home.
What should I say exactly? Your husband was in my room confessing his love and kissing me forcefully? I wonder if she would believe me because of the "reputation" I had.
I know, thankfully, nothing went beyond touching and kissing, but these are moments that have left a mark in my memory, and the worst part is that I can never tell anyone or else I will break hearts or homes, or maybe people will somehow manage to prove my whore-ness, "She did not know her place", "Her parents should not have given her this much freedom", and "She knew she was a slut seducing her friend's husband."